Turning the Camera Around: An Interview with Carlo Alcos

Outsiderness

By: Maggie Shirley

On Thursday, June 19, filmmaker Carlo Alcos stood on stage at Nelson’s Capitol Theatre, humbly basking in the audience’s vibrant, joyous response to his first feature-length documentary film. The theatre held over 250 people – friends, family and strangers – celebrating the story he had just shared with us and his courage to tell it.

That story is an autobiographical documentary, entitled Outsiderness. The film is a journey through aspects of Alcos’ life as a second generation Filipino-Canadian, including a trip to his parents’ homeland of the Philippines.

Shortly before the premiere of the film, Carlo and I had a conversation via video call.

MS: So, Carlo, you are the director of a new documentary. It is premiering at the Capitol on June 19th. What is the film about?

CA: It covers themes of identity and belonging and assimilation. But what it’s really about is my experience as a child of immigrant parents who came from the Philippines to Canada in the early 70s, and specifically, growing up for myself. I grew up in a suburb near Vancouver called Langley and at the time, in the 80s, it was a predominantly white neighbourhood. In my school classes, I would be one of two, maybe three brown kids. And so, it is just me having a close look at what that experience was like and how it shaped me growing up. Because one of the fascinating things to me is that even in that environment, I was never picked on or anything like that. I had lots of friends. I internalized [racism] somehow and I basically grew up ashamed to be Filipino. I talk about in the film: I talk about a memory I have of scrubbing my skin hard in the shower, trying to wash the brown off. I didn’t have the bullying or any of that going on. But I still have internalized it. It’s a deep dive into that and then also a journey in me exploring my family history, my culture, because I never learned that stuff growing up. While I didn’t experience blatant racism or the bullying growing up, what I have experienced is, for my whole life, hearing people ask me, “Where are you from?” I always talk about this because I know it sounds like such a benign and harmless question. And you know, maybe on a one off it is. I was born in Canada. I was raised here. I experienced the culture just like anyone else who was born in Canada. I feel just as Canadian as anyone else. But then you get asked that question all the time and it really it affects you on a much deeper, deeper level. I was talking with a neighbour about this because her parents immigrated to Canada from Germany, so she’s also a second-generation immigrant, but she never heard that question growing up. If you’re white, you generally don’t get asked that question, but if you’re not white, then you get asked that question a lot. And the cumulative effect is that it creates a sense of “Oh well, maybe I’m not from here.” Do I not belong here?

MS: Did your understanding of “outsiderness” change as you were making the documentary?

CA: Yeah, without giving away too much. I started this film around late 2022. It’s about two and a half years in the making. It wasn’t what I expected at the beginning, but I ended up going on kind of this big personal growth journey where I came out the other end of it a changed person essentially. And for the better in my opinion. At some point in the making of this, I realized that was really what was important for me – that change, the growth that I experienced, the journey that I went on. And the film itself, where at the beginning, the film was the goal; so, all my efforts and everything was going toward that end, but along the way, I thought the film is going to be nice to do, nice to have. But when we’re thinking about just life in general, that was what became really important to me.

MS: How did the film come about?

CA: What kickstarted the documentary for me was an article in the Nelson Star that said Tagalog and Punjabi are Nelson’s two fastest growing languages. It validated what I was seeing on the street. So, I was curious, who are these Filipinos? I did a bit of research. I found a Facebook group where they were gathering and introduced myself on Facebook. I joined the community. I introduced myself and I started meeting with some people and then I went to a Christmas event of theirs and I went to the Philippines Independence Day the next summer. My original idea was that I was going to make a documentary about the Filipino community. That was what I had actually set out to do. But as I hung around them more I realized how little I fit in with them because I didn’t have the cultural connection. I didn’t speak the language and so it was a weird kind of experience because here is this group of people who are from where I’m from, but I don’t connect with them. It’s hard to feel like I belong with them. And then I also have this element of not belonging here. It’s like this liminal space that I inhabit, and I feel like many second-generation immigrants inhabit this space.

MS: Did this give you a new insight?

CA: Yeah, I realized that the film actually wasn’t going to be about the community. It was going to be about me and what I was experiencing. The second-generation immigrant experience. This experience growing up as children of immigrant parents, so born and raised in Canada, I feel like it’s a very specific experience and it’s kind of a unique experience. It doesn’t get talked about a lot because usually when we’re talking about racism or immigration, it’s newcomers or it’s about blatant racism. What second generation immigrants face, I think, is a very subtle form of racism. It’s the systemic, institutionalized racism, you know, the microaggressions, that kind of stuff. It is hard to talk about because it’s not as tangible. I think it is important to talk about it and that’s a big reason why I wanted to make this and put it out into the world because I want to have that conversation.

MS: It’s an important conversation to have. Going back to the Filipino community, do you have anything you want to say about the tragedy that happened at the Lapu Lapu Festival in April?

CA: For the community in general, obviously it was a really big impact. I didn’t personally know anyone who died. I believe I had some extended family who were there at the festival, but they weren’t there when it happened. Fortunately. But just as a community, everyone was reeling and feeling it and just obviously felt very connected to it. I grew up in Vancouver too. I know where that happened, so I’m very familiar with the with the area. We always talk about the news cycles and how quickly people’s attentions move on, which makes sense. You can’t focus on one thing for a long time, because things are just constantly happening. So, we’re months later, but you know people’s lives have been changed forever, for the rest of their lives, [and those of their] families and friends.

MS: The documentary will be premiering at the Capitol on June 19. Do you have other places that you’re going to be showing it?

CA: I’ve heard someone has expressed interest in screening it in Trail already. And then I think I’ll know more after Thursday. So far, only two people have seen the film and that was just to help me make sure that there’re no obvious errors. I had a team behind me who helped me along when I was making it and they would review it and give me feedback. But in terms of the actual finished polished film, only two other people have seen it to this point. I don’t know what people are going to think. My hope is that people can take something out of it and see the value in it, and that some people resonate with it. I think if that happens, then some people might be interested in saying, “Hey, I’d love to screen this.” I have a friend who lives in Winnipeg. I think Winnipeg has the largest Filipino community in Canada and so I hope to bring this to Winnipeg. Other than that, I think it’s going to be submitting to film festivals and then at some point down the road, I may just post it publicly online.

MS: Do you have plans or a vision for your next project or are you just going to take a breath now that you got your first major documentary finished?

CA: I think I’m taking a breath. Something that I discovered because of this film and because of working on this is that I have this passion and a renewed appreciation for Filipino culture in the Philippines. I feel like the next chapter is really focusing on Filipino stories. I believe strongly in representation because, growing up in the 80s, I didn’t see people like me on screens or in media. And so that was another motivating factor for me in creating this film was I wanted to add to the diversity in the media landscape and to increase representation. I would love to seek out more interesting Filipino stories in Canada to tell, so that that’s kind of my hope. I don’t have anything specific yet, but that is what I want to do.

MS: Carlo, if people want to know more about the documentary or more about you, how can how can they get in touch?

CA: There are many pathways. One is Google. You can just Google my name, but specific to the documentary, there’s is the website (outsidernessfilm.com). I’m on Instagram @outsiderness_doc, also my personal one is @carlo_alcos. And then I also I write a Substack blog (outsiderness.substack.com) and I’ve been writing. It’s really cool because I came from writing. I was a writer and editor for many years. I hadn’t written in a long time, so it was really nice to return to writing. Along the journey, I would write my thoughts. It’s a diary of sorts through the journey. There’s lots of little tidbits in there and they’re not very long posts. So, that’s another avenue to see some of my work and [gain] some more insight into the film.

MS: Well, thank you so much, Carlo. This has been a lovely interview with you, and I really hope it all goes well on the launch on Thursday and that many, many people see this film and it goes far and wide.

CA: Thank you.

Outsiderness is now available for public screenings.

There were over $1800 in donations raised at the premier of Outsiderness. The funds went to the Kapwa Strong fund at Filipino BC. If you wish to donate directly, please go to filipinobc.com and select the Kapwa Strong campaign.

You can also listen to an episode of the West Kootenay Regional Arts Council’s podcast Vibrant Basin featuring an interview with Carlo, hosted by Shayla Jones. Listen wherever you get your podcasts or at: Carlo Alcos | Vibrant Basin